The Damned Crow

(Translated from another blog)


Mom.. what's love?
-It's the feelings between papa and me.

Mom.. what's life?
-It's when your heart beats..

Mom.. what's eternity?
-It's something that never ends..

Mom, will you love me eternally?
-Yes, of course darling..

Mom, do you think I can live close to you eternally?
-In your heart.. yes you can

But mom.. what is death?
-It's where your grandmother is sleeping...

Does she love us from there?
-Yes.. forever..

Mom... when I die.. I will keep loving you forever.. Will you too?
-Darling, you will live for a long time before dying... so don't think about this..

But... will you love me?
-Yes.. forever..

Mom... when will you die?
-Soon...

Why mom?
-Because a bad man did bad things to me...

What did he do to you?
-He stabbed me with a knife...

Why did he do that mom?
-Because we are not like him...

What's the difference mom?
-The colour of our skin...

But mom, I don't understand.. the colour of our hair is not the same neither..
-I know..

And we all have a heart,... we are the same if we have a heart...
-I know....

And.. is it because of him you are lying on here?
-Yes my angel.

Where are we mom?
-It's the hospital.

Mom, I'm scared...
-No, don't be, you don't have to fear

But mom.. I don't want you to go..
-One day we will see each others again..


Will I wait for a long time?
-I hope..


Why?
-Because I want you to enjoy your life...


Mom... I love you...
...


Mom?
...


Mom?
...


Mom..

I just dropped by... wanting to write something... but went frozen on my keyboard...

I talked with someone earlier... It reminded me of a lot of things...

Things that can't be forgotten... but put away
Feelings that can't be dead..... but forgotten

It kills me, it tortures me,
It tears my heart,
Most of you know what I am talking about so no need to explain.

If only one could read between the lines....
Or when looking at eyes...
Or understanding trailing dots....

-
I think of it when I'm alone....
And I am usually alone...
I am denying it, I am trying to forget it...

They are swords around me...
If I think of it too much.. the swords come closer and tear me.
If I don't think of it, the swords become flames that burn me...
And everyday is the same...

No one to blame...

Why do we have to love anyway....
Why do we have to suffer it...
Why don't we go away....
Why don't we forget it

No one can answer those questions...

Even more, no one can help you...
You're on your own...
You suffer alone
From the skin to the bone

When you think that things are coming clear... you got it all wrong...
It's been a long time we split....
But time means nothing....

I am damned with these feelings, I can't stop it.
I can't end it.... I tried...

Good night.....
Hoping this is my last, like every night.